Courage, to stay strong even in this moment of horror.
Friendship, to keep me supported by others.
Love, to be an enduring feeling, always.
Knowledge, to know that things will get better.
Purity, to keep me from doing something stupid.
Sincerity, to remain true, always.
Hope, to know that things will return to good.
Light, to guide my way through this dark time.
I wish real life was like Digimon.
Im sick of trying
So very hard
To understand what
Cannot be understood
By my feeble brain.
Im sick
Of feeling unwanted
Unneeded
Unloved.
Im sick of living
This miserable
Existence.
Im sick of hearing
Sweet lies
That arent even masked
With some measure
Of truth.
Im sick
In the mind
In the body
Im sick,
Sick in the heart.
The Last Words He Heard by kuwabaratheman, literature
Literature
The Last Words He Heard
Tom arrived at the restaurant, feeling around the small box in his pocket. Everything was perfectly arranged for this night. After two long years, he was finally ready to make the leap. This was going to be an anniversary to remember for both of them. He found Sally situated at the table already and sat down across from her.
Hey, beautiful, he said, a grin breaking out across his face. She looked up at him and smiled back weakly.
Hey, Tom, she replied sullenly. Tom frowned. He always could tell when something was on her mind, and this was definitely exhibit A.
Baby, is something wrong? Did you have a bad d
Why dont I just kill myself?
Wouldnt that be a little easier
To handle? Wouldnt that be
Better than all the lies and
Deception and wounds
That I have suffered?
To Be or Not To Be
That is the question:
And the answer is
Not under my control
anymore
This feeling is so magical, and it makes me
Return to my fullest strength, as Im completed.
Underlying everything, these feelings are powerful.
Everyone likes to drag us down with their hurtful words,
Likening me to a pedophile, even. But none of what they say can bring us down.
Opening up, I finally feel the acceptance Ive always desired.
Very strong words and emotions are always flowing between us.
Everything feels so perfect, as long as Im with you.
Youre the reason
that Im still alive.
How many times in the past seven months
have I contemplated ending
it all?
I make things so hard
for you, always breaking down
just because I heard some criticism
and I cant handle anything on my own.
I always overreact in stupid ways.
Just a few minutes of not hearing
From you, or when you dont react
In the way I thought you would.
Because I am so dependant,
And cant stand on my own feet.
Paranoia
overtakes my body, my mind,
my heart. It drags me down,
cursing me to always think the worst
of everything and everyone. Always
thinking that Im just the
It took so long to reach the point
Where I could be comfortable like this.
I wake up in the morning
Smiling as I think of talking to you,
(sometimes deliriously believing
I actually am talking to you)
I fall asleep at night
With comfort, as I picture your arms around me
I found peace in my life
When Im sick, I can get better
When Im lonely, your voice will talk
All I got to say is I must have done something good
I feel completely blessed to have you
Fixing my life, and giving me purpose.
You give me an ear that will listen when I need it
A voice that will speak words that help
And arms that will hold me when I
Crashing water, invoking memories of summer trips.
Hard rocks, they look like they could rip into my feet
Just by narrowly stepping on one.
The beauty of nature
Captured with such simple lines and brushstrokes.
Simple drawings bring it all back
Not just sight, but smell and sound, too
The lost summers of youth are recaptured here
Memories of times when family members got along
And every vacation wasnt torture.
Nature looks best
When it is captured so simply
Such a nice look at nature
Yet in the background, modernity
Rears its ugly head
It is coming to remove nature
And to remove our youthful memories.
Its going to
My dear friend,
You were more important to me
Then you ever knew. People made fun of me
For how close I was to you, but screw them, I
Really did love you
As my dearest friend.
You were a rock that kept me going
My support, and in spite
Of your humor and how you could sometimes
Make me cry, you always
Brought a smile to my face.
I miss those nights
When you would come to my room
And fall asleep, because you needed
A place to stay. It made me happy
To have someone who I could have
A trusting relationship with, and because
I was the one who you really trusted
When I thought the others meant more.
You were my first friend
At t
I never believed
In this silly concept
Love
It was something so artificial
And fake. A concept
That was made up for movies
And thats all it ever was.
Until she came along
And suddenly, my eyes
Were open for the first time
My heart finally understood
Thinking only of one person
Feeling happy whenever you think of them
Having one person with such power over you.
Such an amazing concept
Love
Magic
It embodies us
The simple things,
They are magical to me.
What I long for .
Something any other person
Would find
Ordinary
But for you and I it is
Extraordinary
Together, we can make anything
Magical
Pain
I wish I could relieve it all
I think of the pain you feel,
Wishing with all my heart
That I could make it disappear.
Your spirit, so beautiful, is of a nature.
That nature is one that will be unable to fly free,
Until something is done.
I want to heal your wings.
Together, we can soar to new heights.
Free from pain, and suffering.
Hope is in the sky, where I look to and see us.
I hear the most angelic voice, ringing through my ears. A wonderful sound, from the most wonderful person. Just hearing this voice, it causes me to lose any worries I have. You are such a great person, and you have a beautiful spirit. It all comes out when I hear you speak.
I love you, and I love hearing you. Listening to you, and talking to you. Everything is so much easier when I speak.
I see a bug crawling, but I think of you and I let it go free. Its tough, given how Ive been my whole life. But I think about you. You have such a hold on my heart and mind.
I draw it in, and feel a mix
I feel relaxed, relieved
At home
And guilty.
Im only fueling things
Im making things more difficult
Im doing things halfway again
Im going to upset people
Like always
I end it for now, and ponder
As I walk back towards the house.
What is it that I want?
Dealing with betrayal by kuwabaratheman, literature
Literature
Dealing with betrayal
The boy stood in his cluttered room and sighed. This personal hell, it had become too much for him to think about. It was amazing, how heaven and hell could go hand in hand. What was once pleasure had now turned into a terrible pain. His heart ached from all the drama he had been forced to endure over the last three days. Today had been the worst, by far. Was there any point in going on, now?
He thought of his so called friends. He had trusted these people so dearly with his deepest secrets and feelings. I would have taken a bullet for any of them he thought silently, as he sat down in the dark. He buried his face into his hands
I'm scared.
Im Scared of everything right now.
Myself
Us
All of this
I feel so ostracized.
I worry youll try and cut me out.
I fear being isolated
And alone
I fear the future
Now more than ever.
I fear that everything is going to fall
Apart
I feel like I cant deal with this
I feel weak
Powerless
Scared
I want things to be right again
I just wish I could set this right.
I want to be apart of your life
And your heart
Tears roll down my face. When was the last time I cried this much? It's been almost 10 months. I had almost forgotten what it felt like. Sure, I cry plenty of times, but this level...it's beyond human understanding.
I've never felt this low in my life. I hate myself, right now. I hate that I cause all these problems for the people I love. Your voice tries to reach me, telling me that it isn't my fault, but I don't believe that. Not for a second. I've caused you too much shit this past day, no matter how much you try to shoulder the burden yourself. I feel so shitty about this, I just I could change things. I want to set things right. I don't
I can't make any promises
I wish that I could, but I can't.
I know that my actions upset you,
But Im weak
So very weak
Even as I do this, I feel no shame.
Perhaps I should, but I dont
I can only think of continuing.
Youre afraid that Im not paying attention
I dont think thats true
I love you, nothing will change that.
Maybe I cant show it well at times,
But thats the truth.
My actions cant be defended,
So I wont try.
Even asking you to understand would be selfish.
I am selfish, but thats regardless right now
Im at a crossroads, I suppose
I dont wan
You're so worried right now
It makes me worry, too
I want to fix things
But I can't do it alone
You think I've changed
But I feel the same
I need your help
To know what to do
I'm scared now
I'm afraid of losing you
But I know one truth
I won't ever let that happen
I need help
I should be strong right now
But my heart is aching
It misses you
Pain
Arguments
Fights
Weve been through too much of that lately.
I just want things the way they were.
Everything feels out of whack right now
Distorted
I love you, and I just want to make you happy
Why?
Why has so much crap come our way?
Its so confusing.
I tell you that we can get through this
But its hard.
So very hard.
I just want to restore things.
But I dont know how
You wanted something,
you never told me until it was too late.
I wanted something else
Your mind was made up
all was said and done,
I had to say goodbye
We stole those moments
those feelings and touches
they didn't belong to us
we acted like they were forever
you met your one who was meant to be
and I had to say goodbye
You drew me from the dark pit
you held me, loved me,
like no-one else had,
or has since
you could not know me fully
you could not understand me
so I had to say goodbye
The match was made
surprisingly 'we' were
you were everything I thought I wanted
I desired and cornered the highest for us
we fo
The waitress had just left our table when Kim began to fidget around nervously. I reached over instinctively to hold her hand, and she only seemed to look more awkward. I can feel that shes keeping something from me. She knows I hate when she does that, but it doesnt ever seem to make a difference.
Its been over a year now. She says slowly. She takes a sip from her coffee, and I wonder what spurred the comment on.
Yeah, it has. I confirm. Its been a really wonderful year for me. She gives a little small, but it feels like one with a lot of pain behind it. We sat in silence for a
Favourite genre of music: good music Favourite cartoon character: Usopp Personal Quote: "The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation." -Henry David Thoreau